Even though dinosaurs are extinct, there are jokes about them that will last forever. These jokes are great for kids to tell and listen to, and dinosaurs may not have walked the earth for over 66 million years, they never fail to make kids (and some adults!) laugh.
As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. The links below may be affiliate links. Please read my disclosure policy for more information.
Q: What do you get when a dinosaur crashes its car?
A: A Tyrannosaurus WRECK
Q: What do you get if you cross a dino and a dog?
A: A dog-a-sore
Q: Why didn’t the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Because there were no road then
Q: Why couldn’t the dinosaur play games on the computer?
A: Because it ate the mouse
Q: What does a triceratops sit on?
A: It’s tricera-bottom
Q: Why don’t you see dinosaurs at Easter?
A: Because they are eggs-tinct!
Q: What do you call a dinosaur with a rich vocabulary?
A: A theSAURUS
Q: What was the name of the fastest dinosaur?
A: The PRONTOsaurus
Q: Why did the dinosaur wear a bandage?
A: Because it had a dino-SORE
Q: What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A: A dino-snore
Q: What do you call a blind dinosaur?
Q: What kind of explosions do dinosaurs like?
Q: What do you get when you get when you cross a pig and a dinosaur?
A: Jurassic Pork
Q: Why did the dinosaur bring string to the baseball game?
A: It wanted to tie up the score
Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Because chickens didn’t exist then
Q: What do you call a deaf dinosaur?
A: Anything you like – it can’t hear you
Q: Why should you never ask a dinosaur to read you a story?
A: Because their tales are so long
Q: Why was the Stegosaurus such a good volleyball player?
A: Because it could really spike the ball
Q: How do you know if there is a dinosaur in your refrigerator?
A: The door won’t shut
Q: What did the dinosaur put on its steak?
Q: What dinosaur would Harry Potter be?
A: The Dinosorcerer
Q: How can you best raise a baby dinosaur?
A: With a crane
Q: What’s the nickname for someone who puts their right hand in the mouth of a T-Rex?
Q: What followed the dinosaur?
A: Its tail
Q: What is the best thing to do if you see a T-Rex?
A: Pray that it doesn’t see you
Q: What do dinosaurs use on the floors of their kitchens?
Q: Which clothing brand is the favourite of dinosaurs?
Q: What game does the brontosaurus like the play with humans?
Q: What do you call a dinosaur that doesn’t take a bath?
Q: What do you get when a dinosaur scores a touchdown?
A: A dino-score
Q: What did the dinosaur use to cut wood?
A: A dino-saw
Q: What was T-rex’s favourite number?
A: Eight (ate)
Q: What makes more noise than a dinosaur?
A: Two dinosaurs
Q: Which dinosaur likes spicy food?
A: The Chile-saurus
Q: What happened after the dinosaur took the school bus home?
A: It had to bring it back
Q: What did the T-Rex say at lunch time?
A: Let’s grab a bite!
Q: What’s the best way to talk to a dinosaur?
A: Long distance
Q: What did the dinosaur say to the traffic policeman after the car crash?
A: I’m-so-saurus, officer!
Q: What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?
A: Tyrannosaurus Tex
Q: Why don’t dinosaurs ever forget anything?
A: Because no one ever tells them anything
Q: How do you invite a dinosaur to a cafe?
A: Tea, Rex?
Q: Which dinosaur can jump higher than a house?
A: Any dinosaur. Houses can’t jump
Q: What should you do when a dinosaur sneezes?
A: Get out of the way!
Q: What do you call a dinosaur that left its armour out in the rain?
A: A Stegosau-rust
Q: Why did the Archaeopteryx catch the worm?
A: Because it was an early bird
Q: What do you call twin dinosaurs?
Q: Where do dinosaurs spend their pocket money?
A: The dino-store
Q: What do you call a T-Rex who hates losing?
Q: What type of tool does a prehistoric reptile carpenter use?
A: A dino-saw
Q: What do you call a dinosaur after a break-up with their girlfriend?
A: Tyrannosaurus ex
Q: What do you call a dinosaur with one eye?
Q: What do you call a baby dinosaur?
A: A wee-rex
Q: Why can’t you hear a Pterodactyl when it goes to the lavatory?
A: Because the pee is silent
Q: What do you call a group of singing dinosaurs?
A: A tyranno-chorus
Q: Do you think anything could tricera-top these dinosaur puns?
A: I dino what to tell you, but probably not
Q: How did the dinosaur feel after it ate a pillow?
A: Down in the mouth
Q: What do you call a dinosaur that’s as tall as a house and has long, sharp teeth and 12 claws on each foot?
Q: What do you call an anxious dino?
A: A nervous-Rex
Q: What do you call a dinosaur fart?
Q: How do you know that a Seismosaurus is under your bed?
A: When your nose is only two inches from the ceiling
Q: Can you name ten dinosaurs in ten seconds?
A: Yes, one gorgosaurus and nine velociraptors
Q: Which is the scariest dinosaur?
A: A Terror-dactyl
Q: What do you call a dinosaur ghost?
A: A scaredactyl
Q: What does a dinosaur call a porcupine?
A: A toothbrush
Q: What do you call a short spiky dinosaur that’s fallen down the stairs?
Q: What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?
Q: What did the dinosaur say to the cashier?
A: “Keep the climate change”
Q: What’s a child’s favourite dinosaur?
A: A Toys-”R”-Us
Q: Why do museums exhibit old dinosaur bones?
A: Because they can’t afford new ones
Q: Describe a dinosaur egg in one word
Q: What’s a dinosaur’s favourite quote?
A: “Jurassic times call for Jurassic measures!”
Q: What kind of dinosaurs make good policeman?
Q: What do you call a dinosaur who is a noisy sleeper?
A: A Tyranno-snorus
Q: Why did carnivorous dinosaurs eat raw meat?
A: Because they didn’t know how to barbecue
Q: How can you tell if there’s an Allosaurus lying in your bed?
A: You’ll see the bright red “A” on its pyjamas
Q: What happened to the man who crossed a T-Rex with a chicken?
A: He got tyrannosaurus pecks
Q: What did dinosaurs use to drive their cars?
A: Fossil fuel
Q: What dinosaur had the worst vision?
A: Tyrannosaurus specs
Q: Can a crappy dinosaur joke get a laugh?
A: You bet Jurassican
Q: When can three giant dinosaurs hide under a small umbrella and not get wet?
A: When it’s not raining
Q: What do you call a paleontologist who sleeps all of the time?
A: Lazy bones
Q: Patient: Doctor, doctor, I keep seeing a dinosaur with orange patches
A: Doctor: Hmm, have you seen an eye doctor?
Patient: No, just a dinosaur with orange stripes
Q: What do you get when a dinosaur walks through the strawberry patch?
A: Strawberry jam
Q: What is a Stegosaurus’s favourite playground toy?
A: A dino-see-saw-r
Q: What kind of dinosaurs used to burst suddenly?
Q: What did the caravan say as he slid down the dinosaur’s neck?
A: “So long!”
Q: What weighs 800 pounds and sticks to the roof of your mouth?
A: A peanut butter and Stegosaurus sandwich
Jake: I lost my pet dinosaur
Sarah: Why don’t you put an ad in the newspaper
Jake: What good would that do? He can’t read
Q: What vehicle does a Tyrannosaurus rex use to travel from planet to planet?
A: A dino-saucer
Q: What did the dinosaur call her shirt making business?
A: Try Sarah’s Tops
Q: What’s as big as a dinosaur but weighs nothing?
A: A dinosaur’s shadow
Q: Did you hear about the Tyrannosaurus rex who entertained a lot?
A: It always had friends for lunch
Q: What happened when the dinosaur walked through a cornfield?
A: He made creamed corn
Q: What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with a glove?
A: I don’t know, but you shouldn’t stick your hand in it
Q: What comes after extinction?
Q: What comes after y-stinction?
Q: What do you get when you cross a Stegosaurus with a cow?
A: Milk that’s scary to drink
Q: What did the dinosaur say when it saw the volcano erupt?
A: What a lava-ly day
Q: What does a Tyrannosaurus do when it takes you out to lunch?
A: First, it pours salt on your head. Then, it gets out its fork
Q: What is in the middle of dinosaurs?
A: The letter S
Q: Why are dinosaurs never overweight?
A: They’re surrounded by scales
Q: What do you get when you cross a Tyrannosaurus rex with explosives?
Q: Why is a teenage dinosaur so moody?
Q: Where did the dinosaur clown get a job?
A: At the carnivore
Q: What’s a sailor’s favourite dinosaur?
A: The mast-odon
Q: Scientists have discovered as fossilised dinosaur fart
A: They described it as a blast from the past
Q: What is the clumsiest dinosaur?
Q: What should you do if you find a blue Dilophosaurus?
A: Try to cheer him up
Despite the fact that dinosaurs no longer walk this earth, the jokes will forever live on and make everyone laugh. We hope you managed to get a chuckle out of yourself or someone else.