There are many reasons why you may not want a baby shower. Perhaps you are a very shy person who has social anxiety and so avoids parties.
Maybe you have recently relocated and now your family and friends may have to travel too far.
Yet, you are thinking about the gifts. People will want to help you celebrate birth by giving you a present.
Can you make a baby registry without having a shower? Would it be considered rude to do so?
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It may be seen as “tacky”
Some people are traditionalists. If they hear that you are pregnant, they will insist that you have a baby shower.
But, you have your reason as to why you don’t want to have one.
You tell them you aren’t having a shower and they are shocked. How can you expect people to give you gifts if you aren’t having a shower?
When it comes to organising a registry it is typically done by the person who is hosting the shower. But there is going to be no shower, so does that mean no registry, too?
Asking for gifts without a baby shower can be labeled as “tacky” by some people.
However, there are ways to avoid that kind of stigma. It involves keeping people digitally informed about your imminent birth.
Get social
There are many different social networking sites available now. Instead of having a baby shower, you could use your favorite site to keep people informed about the pregnancy.
At the top of the posts, you could pin your registry. Pinning the gift list makes it easier for people to find it.
You could drop subtle hints now and then about the registry in your posts. Such as “There is a registry available, it’s pinned to this page.”
By doing so you aren’t outrightly asking people to give you presents. You are leaving it up to the visitors to your page to decide whether to give or not.
Make a webpage
For those who want something a bit more formal than a social network, you can create a website. Here you can blog about your pregnancy, upload images, and anything else you want to include (get creative!).
Making a website can seem like a daunting task for some. However, sites such as Wix, Squarespace, and WordPress make everything easy.
You don’t need any coding knowledge. Everything is done through templates (website page designs).
So you just sign-up and choose which template you love the most. After that let your family and friends know about your site. You can create a page that links to your registry.
Send out an email
Another way to do a baby registry without a shower is through email.
In the body of the email explain in a persuasive way why you have decided not to have a baby shower. Next, say that there is a baby registry available and have a link within your email.
Here is a way that you can weed out those who may want to buy you a gift from those who don’t: Instead of including a link to your registry, ask people to reply back asking for it.
Why should you have a registry?
When people find out you’re expecting, they will be inclined to buy you a present. That’s not such a bad thing.
You may find that you are asked about the registry.
The registry is your shopping list for the items that you need for the baby. It allows your friends and family to purchase things that will ease the financial burden on you.
It sets you up for time you come home after the birth.
They may ask about the baby shower. Talk about awkward because you aren’t going to have one.
So what do you do?
Explain why there is going to be no baby shower. Then politely thank those who offer to buy you a gift.
Don’t have a registry at all
If you have a registry, how many people will stick to it? Talk to some mothers and they will tell you: A few individuals ignore the registry altogether.
So, if people pay no attention to the registry, why bother making one? To be honest, you don’t have to if you don’t want to.
Sure, etiquette around pregnancy may dictate that a registry is “necessary”. But that is traditionalist thinking. The old traditions are being done away with to make room for more modern thinking.
As mentioned, when your friends and family hear that you are pregnant, they are excited. Through that excitement, they offer to go and buy you a gift.
Some people won’t buy you anything. That’s life.
At the end of the day, there will be things you have to buy for yourself. Of course, you have bought the more major items. Your nearest and dearest will have supplied you with the smaller essentials. But, when you take stock of what you have, there will be bits and pieces that you still need to purchase.
Opting not to have a registry can also alleviate some of the social stigma that you may face. Remember, you may be seen as being a little tasteless asking for gifts without a baby shower. To prevent that type of reputation you can decide to ditch the registry.
You can do a registry without a baby shower
When your friends and family hear that you’re expecting a baby, they may ask about a baby shower. Some will insist that you have one.
You don’t need to feel obligated to have a shower. You have your reason why a baby shower isn’t on the cards.
But not having a shower doesn’t mean you can’t make a registry. People will want to buy you a gift and will ask about the registry. You can then let them know how they can get a copy of it. Many online baby products retailers provide the chance to create a virtual registry. Or you can go old school and write one out.
Don’t feel bullied by those who think having a registry without a baby shower is tacky. You can simply explain why you don’t want a shower and leave it at that.
A registry isn’t a demand list. Whether your friends and family stick to the registry or not isn’t important.
The whole purpose is to celebrate you and your pregnancy.
Is it okay to not have a baby shower but do a registry? Absolutely!
So go and make your list.