10 Damaging Behaviors of a TOXIC Mother-In-Law That Poison Relationships

By Krystal Brown

When you meet the perfect man and you sense that a wedding is on the cards, you will be anxious to get on well with your mother-in-law. While most people get on with their mother-in-law, some marriages come under strain when a partner and a mom do not get along. If you have an inkling that your mother-in-law doesn’t like you, look out for these 10 tell-tale signs that she is holding a grudge. 

She Is Dismissive

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Whether she ignores you in a group conversation or simply doesn’t make an effort to listen to you at all, a dismissive mom-in-law can be difficult. When your partner’s mom does not make an effort to pay you any attention it is a surefire indication that she does not like you. If your relationship is in the early stages you could put it down to her being nervous about meeting you but a little effort should be the minimum you would expect when her child brings someone new into their life. 

She Gives You Backhanded Compliments 

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Sometimes a mother-in-law can be sneaky by paying you an insult that they add a bit of fluff on to make it seem like a compliment. Sometimes it takes a second for you to realize that she is not being as nice as she seems but when you do it hits hard. 

She Shows No Interest In Your Career

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Nobody likes to bring too much of their work home with them but some discussion of work inevitably happens during your downtime. Honestly, talking about work can sometimes be a positive thing as you get to tell others about the great things you do. When your mother-in-law shows no interest at all in what you do for a living, it is a sign that she does not care about you. 

She Publicly Shames You

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One of the biggest red flags when it comes to toxic relationships is when people deliberately put you down in front of others. This should never be something you experience with your mother-in-law but making swipes at you when there are other people around and playing it off like a joke is a sign that she is trying to get one up on you. 

She Talks About You Behind Your Back

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The worst kind of mother-in-law is the one who is all smiles on your face and just when you think things are going great you find out that she has been talking about you behind your back. Generally, this type of deception is difficult to confront as it means exposing the person who told you the truth.

She Gives You Gifts That Are A Cheap Dig

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You may think that getting gifts from your mother-in-law is a great sign of love but next time you receive one from her, pay attention. What seems like a thoughtful gift can often have a hidden message that screams “You’re not good enough for me son.” Think of a nice set of casserole dishes that really means she thinks you should cook more or expensive shampoo that reads “I don’t like your hair.”

She Cannot Maintain Boundaries

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A Mother-in-law can be overbearing but after a while, they get the drift when you start to show who is the boss in your home. However, if your mother-in-law persistently oversteps boundaries despite you and your partner repeatedly talking to her then she is likely to always be a problem. 

She Does Not Have Any Photographs of You In Her Home

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Next time you are at your mother-in-law’s home have a look around each room to see if there are any pictures of you out. While some people are not photograph people there should be at least one of you and your spouse on your wedding day. If you see lots of pictures of every other family member and not you, you have a huge problem. 

She Doesn’t invite You to Family Events

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Leaving you out of the gallery wall is one thing but when you discover that you have not been invited to family events it can really hurt. This act of cruelty will be difficult for even your partner to tolerate but you can always be the better person by continuing to invite her to the events that you host. 

She Talks About Your Partner’s Exes

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It is an unspoken rule that any talk of exes is forbidden around new partners so when your mother-in-law brings them up at every opportunity she is trying to tell you something. When she does this she is trying to make you jealous so simply ignore her and revel in the fact that she was an ex for a reason and she is the one who is jealous of your relationship with her son. It is safe to say that if you have experienced any of the above then your mother-in-law might not like you very much. 

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