In the pursuit of happiness, it’s essential to recognize and address the detrimental habits that often stealthily undermine our well-being and contentment.
Comparing Yourself to Others
Why do we compare ourselves to others? It’s such a pointless thing to do. Regardless of how we are doing in life, there is always going to be someone who is richer, more attractive or more successful than us. But that doesn’t matter!
Instead of being down about it, you need to learn to celebrate your own achievements. While people have always done this, the rise of social media has made this worse. Often people have the habit of making their life look perfect online when the reality is much different.
Holding Grudges
Holding grudges only serves to make us unhappy. They are completely useful and instead, it means that we have to carry a heavy emotional burden around with us. While it’s natural to feel hurt when we’re wronged, it doesn’t need to consume your life.
Holding onto these grudges only perpetuates our own suffering. Does that mean you have to forgive? Not always. Sometimes you just need to accept that it’s the way it is. No need to hold a grudge, no need to forgive, just move on.
Living in the Past or Future
Don’t fall in love with the way things were, or the way you think they’ll be in the future. Conversely, don’t dwell on past mistakes or be worried about things that may or may not happen in the future. It’s always best to be focused on today.
Happiness can only ever be found in the present. Focus on mindfulness and being content with what you have around you right now. While you may have goals for the future, that doesn’t mean you should lose focus on the here and now.
Overthinking and Catastrophizing
Many people have the toxic trait of always thinking that the worst-case scenario is going to happen. This leads to unnecessary distress as you’ll be worrying about things that are very unlikely to take place.
Most of the things that we worry about never come to pass. However, what we’re left with is the aftermath of our stress and anxiety, which can be exhausting. It’s important to try to break the cycle by challenging irrational thoughts and replacing them with logical arguments.
Seeking Perfection
No matter how hard we try, none of us are perfect. While it may sound cool to say that you’re a perfectionist, it’s a toxic trait. It sabotages your happiness as you’ll be chasing an impossible dream that is never going to happen. While there is no issue with having high standards, often you need to cut yourself some slack and realize that being good enough is okay. A 9/10 job in something may not be perfect but it’s an excellent result that you should give yourself credit for.
Neglecting Self-Care
We all need to practice some self-care every now and again. Neglecting your well-being and never giving yourself a break can take a toll on your happiness. Eventually, you can burn out and that’s not good for anyone.
You need to recharge in any way that works for you. This could be classical relaxation methods such as reading, meditating, and yoga or doing something that you love such as gaming, watching sports or hanging out with friends.
Constantly Seeking External Validation
Getting the opinion of others can be important. However, these opinions should only ever come from those that you love and respect. Seeking validation and acceptance from people you don’t care for is a fruitless task.
True happiness comes from within and seeking external validation will only leave you feeling empty. It’s vital to cultivate self-esteem and self-acceptance. Dress how you want, listen to the music want, do the job you want, and so on. You get the picture! You do you.
Surrounding Yourself with Negativity
There are two types of people in your life, fountains or drains. Fountains are the people who fill up your life. They have a positive impact, give you support, and help you up when you fall. These are the people who you want in your life.
Drains are the ones who suck the life right out of you. They are pessimistic, don’t offer you support and are content to join in your misery. If you are surrounding yourself with drains, you need to cut them out of your life.
Becoming Comfortable
It’s easy to get comfortable. You don’t like your job, but you don’t hate it enough to leave. You’re not happy in your relationship, but are scared to go it alone. These are examples where you’re neglecting personal growth.
If you’re happy, then enjoy that comfort by all means! What we’re saying is that don’t accept not being happy. If there is something in your life that you want to change, then change it. You won’t regret it.
Ignoring Mental Health Needs
This is probably the most serious toxic trait of them all due to the potential consequences. If you’re struggling mentally, ask for help. While that’s the biggest ‘easier said than done’ in the world, it’s the only way.
Help can come in the form of a friend, family member, doctor, or even a stranger. It’s important to treat mental issues with the same priority as physical ailments.
Have you already got help previously but are falling into bad habits? Make sure you do all the things that work for you, whether that is medication, going for walks, reading, going to therapy, or anything else.
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