My Kid Is a Furry and I Feel Out of My Depth

By Aaron Stone

A concerned mom looked for support online after her daughter revealed that she identifies as a furry. The daughter revealed the news to her sister, who then told her parents, who were both confused and worried by the news. The 50-year-old mom and her husband sat down to ask their daughter what this all meant, and she told them a furry is “someone who wears an animal costume.”

The Dad Did Not Take It Well

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The OP said her husband did not take the revelation well, telling his daughter, “ Absolutely no way. You can be a male or you can be a female, but you’re not going to be an animal or a toaster or an inanimate object.”

The Mom Is Trying to Be Understanding

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In contrast to the dad, the mom says she’s trying to understand and accept as she thinks she is “trying to find herself.” The mom told readers her daughter has many friends exploring their gender identity and has many trans and pans**ual friends, for example.

She Wants Her to Be Happy

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Asking her daughter if she likes girls or boys, she said she did not identify as any of those things, so mom reinforced that she can be anyone she wants. Mom wants her daughter to be happy but does not quite understand what being a furry really means.

What Is a Furry?

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A furry is someone who has an interest in anthropomorphic animals or animals with human qualities. Furries often create their own animal character, known as a fursona, which functions as their avatar within furry communities. Fursonas are each based on an animal — a dog, cat, reptile, bird, wild animal, or even mythical creature — but they walk upright like humans do and often have a cartoon-like appearance.

It Could Be a Phase

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One online user suggested that this could be a phase and that the woman should not worry too much. They said, “Kids go through a lot in their early teens; I’d suspect your daughter has just decided this is the clique she wants to be part of; it’s cool.”

It’s Not a New Thing

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In response to people suggesting that furries are a new thing, one user said, “I’m almost 40 and have friends my age and older who are furries, so it’s definitely not a new thing.” This person went on to say, “Honestly, it’s not that different than if your daughter just suddenly got really into Star Wars.

It Is Not a Fetish

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It is important to note that furries are not part of a fetish. While some furries may also be attracted to anthropomorphic animals, this is not a requirement for being a furry.

It Is Just Another Hobby

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Lots of people reassured the mom that her daughter was just pursuing an interest, saying, “Honestly, mama, my best suggestion is to treat this like any other hobby she wants to be involved in.” Another person said, “Yeah, I wanted to clarify that — furries aren’t interested in changing their identity and “becoming” an animal; it’s more of a hobby where you dress up as an animal and have animal characters.”

It’s a Spectrum

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In response to some people saying that being a furry is just a hobby, one person commented to say that there could be some underlying issues. This person said, “I mean, it is a spectrum. There are a couple people who are more comfortable in their furry persona than with their real body. I’m guessing that is a really small percentage, but there are all kinds of people out there.”

Take Some Caution

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A furry enthusiast replied to the mother’s post, emphasizing that being a furry is mainly a hobby but advising caution. They mentioned, “As a parent, there are considerations to keep in mind. While the community is generally inclusive and positive, it does have connections to both the fetish and adult content communities.”

Education Is Key

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The main advice for the mom was to educate her on the furry community as much as possible and to talk to her daughter about how involved in the community she is. It is also important to encourage your furry child to be safe online. As with any online community, there are some risks associated with participating in the furry fandom. 

Keep Talking to Your Daughter

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The mom received some great advice when told, “The furry community can genuinely be great. They can be creative, wildly accepting, and super supportive. But like all communities, there are those who are toxic, and there are going to be age-inappropriate things. Keeping a cautious eye on your daughter as she explores this hobby.