A woman fell out with her sister and her husband over her daughter’s treatment on a recent day out. The woman posted on an online forum to ask if she was right to call her daughter selfish for “cutting the line” for rides at their local zoo.
Family Vacation
The woman told readers she was on vacation with her three children (7, 8, 10) and her sister, who has two children ( 7 and 10). They took a day out at a zoo with fairground rides, so while the women grabbed a coffee, the kids went on the rides. The women sat down at a table and asked the children to meet them there when they had been on all rides.
>The Daughter Returned Early
The woman was surprised to see that her daughter returned early from the rides, which prompted her to think she was upset by the rides. In contrast, the eight-year-old said she had loved the rides and had already been on them as she “skipped the lines.” Asking her to explain, the OP was surprised to hear that her daughter had taken the space for single riders when there was space on the ride.
It Was Meant to Be a Time to Bond
The woman was annoyed that her daughter had skipped the line on all five rides, as the whole point of them going on the trip was to spend time together. The woman scolded her daughter and told her that she was selfish to cut the line.
Harsh Words Were Exchanged
Not intent on telling her daughter she was selfish, the woman said she told her daughter that she “understands why she doesn’t have many friends if this is how she acts all the time.” Shocked by this exchange, the woman’s sister told her she was being too harsh and bought her daughter an ice cream to console her.
Her Husband Was Not Happy
The OP’s sister was not alone, as she had support from the woman’s husband, who was happy at how his wife treated their daughter. The woman finished the post by saying that her daughter was upset and her husband was “mad at her,” but she felt she needed to see what others thought as she didn’t think she was out of line.
Readers Could Not Believe Their Eyes
There was a lot of empathy for the young girl, as many pointed out that the woman was wrong to treat her daughter as she did. They said, “She’s probably never gonna do it again, poor thing.” Others were more worried about the harsh words about her not having any friends, which is the kind of thing for which she will end up in therapy. One reader recalled their own story of their mom saying mean things about making friends when she said, “My mom said something like that a couple of times, and guess what, it made making friends even harder!”
People Notice Huge Red Flags
The mom’s behavior was a concern for many, with one reader saying, “so weird that she would go straight to selfishness and not say, “That’s a little unsafe. Did you guys agree to meet somewhere afterward so you’re all together at the end?” Another observant reader said, “I honestly wonder if maybe OP was just frustrated that the kid got back so soon and lashed out.” This comment got a lot of likes as other online users speculated that the woman just wanted more time with her coffee kids free.
The Daughter Could Have Been Given Advice
Some readers understood that the OP wanted her daughter to spend time with her cousins, so she suggested, “instead of treating this as a teaching moment, you tell your child “I get why you have no friends.” The woman could have encouraged the girl to see things from her cousin’s perspective in that they may have been looking to spend time with her, but she went off on her own.
It Could Have Been So Different
One reader thought that the daughter riding on her own was a positive thing and said the woman could have said, “How about, that’s awesome you feel so confident in choosing to go solo? Another reader agreed, saying, “It’s a bold move that a lot of adults won’t do, like going to dinner alone or a movie.”
She May Have Been on Her Anyway
One insightful reader commented, “There are two ten-year-olds, two seven-year-olds, and the eight-year-old. I’ve been the odd cousin out. You pretty much made the eight-year-old a single rider”. One reader pointed out that if the other kids had thought on “there was an odd number which isn’t good for rides. She took the single rider. They all could have. She was faster.
The thread ultimately agreed that the woman was the a**hole, so we guess she has a lot of makeup to do.